A year to think

It's been a year since I seriously started contemplating home education. I can remember because it all started with a week of emails ona parenting forum about home ed, and then I was due to stay with a colleague that weekend and when I got there she was home educating and quite open about her reasons why, and the way they went about it, and I felt really inspired.

The reason I can remember the date is a bit less than inspirational. I had to fit in a birthday party first, before I undertook the five hour drive to her house on a Saturday. I was very flummoxed, it was going to be the first time I had left Rosie overnight, I was nervous about the drive, nervous about staying with her in case they didn't like me, I hate bag packing at the best of times ... and so inevitably I was running late. We arrived at the cinema after the birthday party people had gone in, my kids were hyper with excitement and got shouted at by a member of staff for running up the stairs in the foyer, eventually we saw Party Dad in the popcorn stall area, and then someone came to tell us they had gone in. None of the kids would move up and let mine sit down. Eventually it was sorted and I sat next to my friend B. I completely lost it at this point and went 'waaahhhhh........' .. you get the idea, lots of snot involved. She ordered me home saying she'd watch my children, dad could come and pick them up, and she also ordered me to cancel my trip 'get the girl's phone number and tell her you're not coming'. Very kind and well intentioned but I didn't want to cancel, yes it was stressful but I wanted to go.

Just as well I did anyway. I wonder if we'd ever have home educated? Maybe. Possibly. I'll never know. But that was definitely a turning point in my head. We went to Manchester to a Doctor who Exhibition (the same one I blogged about in the New Year after we took Dad) and to see the inlaws straight after in half term, there was a glorious autumn sky on the way down, and I had a sense of freedom, of being in control of my family's education as even if we stuck with school it would be a *choice*, and realised I wouldn't have to stick to holidays if we were home educating. Then it was Halloween and Rosie's 1st birthday straight after, so we had a party involving slime made out of cornflour and doughnut dangling, and I remember looking at everyone thinking 'I've heard of a really cool way of living, wonder if we'll ever do it?'

And now we are doing it. And sometimes it isn't wonderful, it's really stressful, like this week when Isaiah was in a funny mood - he wound up us all so much that by Wednesday I couldn't be bothered to battle with him. But for the majority of the time it's great, and when I look back to how I felt when they were in school, how he'd have funny weeks and there would be all sorts of problems that I couldn't help him with, and when I look at how much better my girls now get on, how much less stressed they all are, and how they are now actually engaging with academic stuff like never before but in a more relaxed fashion, and from a selfish point of view, how I have no school run, days chopped up halfway through the afternoon then tired kids not at their best, uniforms to be cleaned and ironed or packed lunches ...... yes, I think it's better. It's early days, but so far so good.